Kirit Ved is so ticked off with News International that he’s thinking of putting in a compensation claim with the court over one missing paper.

The problem actually stems from the key to his tote box at his store, Ved News in East London’s Stoke Newington. He says that when NI took over from Smiths News a couple of years ago, he got two keys cut - one for himself, one for the delivery man. NI had said it would pay. “I am still waiting for payment,” he says.

Then in May he got a letter from NI headed ‘Urgent information required’ and telling him he must get in touch or it would be assumed that his location was no longer secure.

When he contacted the call centre he was told he needed to get copies of the two keys cut. He’s been arguing ever since with various call centre bods who all promise call backs, visits from area manager and so on, none of which has happened.

I rang the call centre and was told that he hadn’t been singled out. There had recently been an overhaul of security as some drivers had said that some retailers had no keys. I asked her why she didn’t just take the driver’s key and get copies and she replied: “We don’t have the facilities to make keys.”

I said neither does Kirit, but that didn’t cut any ice. She added that if he could prove that he has a ‘master key’ which apparently carries some sort of ID on it, then it would all be fine.

Kirit says that, while all this was going on, his previous Saturday Times delivery was a copy short. He rang to get a credit issued and went through all the security procedure. Did the bundle arrive? Yes. Locked cage? Yes. In a secure area? Yes. Then he got another letter telling him he would not be credited because he hadn’t proved his location was secure - the key business again.

He says: “The driver scans in the bar codes, so there is proof.”

Perhaps it will be small claims court. When he mentioned this to the call centre he was told: “Go ahead.” (They didn’t actually add, “Make my day, punk”, but it’s fun to imagine they did.)